Dating is more challenging now than ever before; this is because we deﬁne our own identities, unlike our ancestors, whose lives were deﬁned by their communities. We also have thousands of options at our ﬁngertips, which cause us to question our decisions. All this just makes us uncomfortable when making big decisions if we can’t research our way to the right answer.
One factor that makes dating more challenging now is social media and how it leads us to believe that everyone else is in healthier and happier relationships. Also, far too few of us have good relationship role models.
I truly believe that the single most important career decision that a woman makes is whether she will have a life partner and who that partner is. ~ Sheryl Sandberg
Many people also suffer from dating blind spots. Dating blind spots are patterns of behavior that hold people back from ﬁnding love, which they can’t identify independently. Logan categorized the most common blind spots into a framework called “The Three Dating Tendencies.” These tendencies are:
• The Romanticizer
• The Maximizer
• The Hesitater
The Romanticizers have unrealistic expectations of relationships. They want the soul mate, the happily ever after, and the whole fairy tale. The Maximizers have unrealistic expectations of their partner. They love to explore their options and want to feel absolutely conﬁdent they’re making the right decision. The Hesitaters have unrealistic expectations of themselves, and they feel like they’re not ready to date. Understanding your dating tendency helps you discover what’s holding you back and how you can overcome these blind spots.