Although modern dating seems quite tricky, it’s possible to get a reliable life partner if you are willing to pay the price. You need to be brave enough to go on dates. Don’t go for a person just because he or she looks great in pictures, gives you a night full of fun, and makes you look cool in front of your friends. Go for a life partner, someone who will be there for you during the highs and the lows. Someone you can rely on and make decisions with. Don’t give in to the natural tendency to focus on your partner’s negative characteristics. Train yourself to see the positives; look for what others might miss when they talk to the same person.
Due to the ever-changing nature of relationships, we should treat them as if they are living and breathing things. But too often, we treat our relationship like a toaster. We take it out of the box, plug it in, and hope it stays the same. A toaster works best on the day you buy it, and it slowly gets worse over time. No one assumes their toaster will adapt or improve. In marriage, we commit to the institution on our wedding day and expect it to stay the same — till death do us part.
Great relationships don’t just appear in our lives; it takes a lot of effort. Taking out time to invest in it is what makes it grow healthier. Let’s ditch the toaster and bring romance into the twenty-first century by adopting the intentional love philosophy.
To know if your partner brings the best in you, pay attention to how you feel when you’re around this person or right after you ﬁnish spending time together. Write down the way you feel. Then get a third-party view by going out with a group of friends. Instead of asking, “What did you think of my partner?” ask, “What did you think of me around my partner?